So, back to the past few days... I've felt myself slipping back to the person I was before LT. Always depressed, or at the least, fighting depression, feeling down about myself, blaming myself for everything that goes wrong, not thinking that I'm worthy of love from anyone. Today it was getting bad, so, as a solution, I made a conscience effort to spend an extended quiet time with God. I started off like I usually start my quiet times, just sitting silently, giving God a chance to speak to me, or lay something on my heart to bring to Him. Then I just started crying out to God, asking Him to take away what was causing me to slip back to the person I was. I went through the cycle of asking Him to comfort me, take away my stumbling block, and/or otherwise be with me several times when I finally picked up my Bible and started reading in Psalms. Specifically Psalms 18. I read the whole chapter, but it was verses 1-19 that really stuck out. This is the part that David first talks about how much he loves God, then he cries out to Him, asking for help. The next part depicts God in an almost superhero light... swooping down from Heaven, and shaking the very foundations of the earth in order to grab David out of his troubles, and out of his enemies reach, and places him on safe, solid ground.
When I read this passage, I picture God setting in His throne room in Heaven, being pampered and worshiped by angels and other beings I can't even begin to describe, and He hears a cry, that only He can hear, and immediately, He jumps up from His throne and shoves angels, and other beings out of His way, leaves Heaven, and with a look of angry determination, He swoops down to Earth, spewing fire, and lighting, so much so that every body of water on earth is vaporized. Somehow, David, or me, whoever I picture at the moment, in this case me, remains unscathed. He reaches down and grabs me out of the muddy, murky, water that still remains and holds me close to His chest. He then gently sets me down on safe, solid land and tells me how much He loves me. I love verse 19 in this passage. The English Standard Version puts it this way: "He brought me out to a broad place; He rescued me because He delighted in me." Even though I don't normally like the Message translation, I also looked up that passage in that version as well, and I also love verse 19 in the Message: "He stood me up in a wide-open field; I stood there saved, surprised to be loved!"
Being the visual person that I am, I loved this section. Psalm 18:1-19. Whatever you're doing right now, you should stop it, and read this passage. I promise you, you won't regret it!
